Presents/Presence

I have been remiss in not writing my annual birthday post, so here we go!

November 2

I celebrated my 25th birthday! And I sort of had a birthday week because why the hell not?

I took my annual birthday trip to Bloomingdale's and got myself a lovely sweater coat, followed by a trip to Dylan's Candy Bar for gummies and yummies, and Serendipity 3 for the ridiculous/sublime/ridiculously sublime Cleopatra's Barge: potato skins topped with sour cream and caviar with a side of red onions. I'm 25, health be damned! Then, later...

"How hot are we getting tonight?" SD asked me via text.

"How well do you know me?" I said.

I texted AS: "In case it wasn't already implied, dress code for tonight is 'look hot, betch.'"

By accident I ended up eating my Dylan's Candy Bar loot for dinner. Nothing says adulthood like caramel creams for an entree. 

That evening, the ladies stepped out, heels and all, downtown. The first stop was Decibel, the rad, red-lit, underground sake bar where the waiters all seem kind of pissed at something but don't really take it out on you. We had octopus sushi in wasabi sauce, a variety of dumplings and a laahhhhhge bottle of sake. Even sipping little bits from those teeny glasses will get you a little more than buzzed (well, me anyway). "You know how I feel about drunken women," my mother said. "But one only turns 25 once..."

Next stop was The Slipper Room, the newly refurbished burlesque house on the Lower East Side. We hooted and hollered at fierce ladies being fierce, jiggling like there was no tomorrow. I was a little worried because it was EL's first burlesque show ("What is burlesque, exactly?" she asked) but she loved it! Another convert to what I feel is a sexy, empowering performance art. Huzzah!

After the show, we left to find another bar, but SEP stopped me. "I know a guy who can get us drinks for free," she said. I figured she knew someone who would be nice and get us a couple of cocktails, but  she actually knew the manager of Beauty & Essex, a rather swank restaurant and bar on the Lower East Side. We ended up getting a table and champagne bottle service. For free. They brought one of the champagne bottles over with a giant sparkler in it and everyone sang happy birthday. I never pictured myself as a lady having a birthday 'at the club' but there I was, and there we all were, and it was marvelous. It was followed by a rather drunken bout of disco fries (cheese and gravy...I know...) at the brilliantly 24-hour Remedy diner and a rather sleepy cab ride home. I even wore my heels the entire time! Like a champ.

November 3

November 3 is my actual birthday, and it was the perfect day to take it easy and relax. Even if that wouldn't have been what I wanted to do, I would have had to because it was the day of the New York Marathon! The marathon runs directly past my house, so there was no crossing the avenue that day to get to the train and go anywhere in particular. It was fine by me, though, since DL was running the marathon! All morning I tracked his pace then did some rough calculations to see when he would be running by me. Luckily, and much of a surprise to the math gods as myself, I did it right and waited for him out by the barriers, brightly glittered sign in my hands saying "Go DL Go!". I had made it the night before, before going out, so there was glitter all over my apartment. Since we checked in before, he knew where to look for me, and soon enough he found me. I got a picture of him and he wished me happy birthday. I have to say, it's one of the best birthday presents I've ever received because it's so unique--I don't know if he'll run the marathon again, or if I'll even be living in the same place, so it could very well be a once in a lifetime opportunity to be wished happy birthday in the middle of the marathon! I was so proud of him. The magnitude of what these people are doing doesn't really strike you until they run past you and...they just keep going. I don't know if they're crazy or brilliant. Or a combination of the two.

Then I went to eat my favorite omelet, granny smith apple, cheddar cheese and chicken apple sausage, at my favorite brunch spot, The Barking Dog. I went for a walk on the East River and read a book. That evening, MDP brought me flowers and sat on my couch eating Chinese food.

November 7
My bro (yes, I said bro) BK took me out to new restaurant Empire Biscuit for my birthday. It's a 24-hour biscuit joint, with rad homemade biscuits, biscuit sandwiches, gravies, spreads, and god knows what else. We sat and had girl talk at their long wooden tables about Nora Ephron, dating, and toothbrushes while indulging in these incredible concoctions. I had a biscuit and sausage gravy sandwich while BK went the 'pig and fig' route, bacon and fig jam. Both were to die for, and I'd go back in a heartbeat. It's great, too, for late night munchies since they're open 24 hours! I mean, who doesn't want homemade, gourmet snacks at all hours of the night?

November 9
It was soiree city at The Blue Banana, my apartment. There were a bunch of people I didn't know and a bunch I did, and everyone had a fabulous time and drank champagne. My delightful roommate made me a funfetti cake topped with pink cherry frosting--"To Our Favorite Diva, Happy Birthday Elyssa." With 25 candles!

November 10
EH stayed over after my birthday and we went gallivanting around downtown. Our first stop was the Daily Candy Bazaar, and we managed to scoop up some free Jamberry nail wraps (they're like sheets of nail polish with different patterns on them)! Next stop was Vanessa's Dumplings--you have to go to the one on Broome and Eldridge, because that's where you can get 10 dumplings for $5. No, I'm not joking. We also got bubble tea and a sesame pancake, then sat on the steps of Eleanor Roosevelt Park on Houston and Chrystie to people-watch. We then strolled through Bond No. 9 fragrances to see if we could swing EH a new perfume. While we weren't exactly anticipating their $275 per bottle, we did score a sample for her, which was pretty sweet. Shortly after, EH left and I bopped around SoHo getting my shop on before meeting MDP for tea at McNally Jackson, my favorite bookstore. Later I went home, all warm and snuggly from the day, and reflected on the past week or so--a perfect start to my 25th year. 

Fall on the Rocks: Zabar's and Central Park

Thankfully this is not a post about tripping on painful objects.

As I have said many a time, try as you might to find it, there is absolutely nothing that compares with fall in New York. There's a cool rush of breeze that runs through your hair and kisses your neck, on top of none too few days of sunshine if you're lucky. What I find interesting, though, is that I don't get to see the changing leaves nearly as often as I thought I would; that is, I'm not in an open green space on a regular enough basis. I did have the pleasure, recently, of walking past the beautiful McCarren Park in between Williamsburg and Greenpoint in Brooklyn, though. Walking along the western edge of the park felt like I was walking down a corridor paved with yellow leaves, upon which walked hipster parents in matching flannels and their unwittingly hipster children similarly adorned.

You would think, too, that living close(ish) to Central Park, I would have taken a gander there on my own in the past few weeks, but to no avail. This past Friday, however, MDP took it upon himself to show me what I was missing. Leaving his workplace at Columbus Circle, we went for a stroll up Broadway to the one and only Zabar's to get supplies for a picnic. It occurs to me now that I have never actually written about Zabar's, one of my favorite places in the entirety of New York, so I will briefly inform you of its magic now. Zabar's is a gourmet and kosher grocery store on the Upper West Side that has been in existence since 1934, an almost entirely family owned and operated business since then. They roast their own coffee, they have a stupendous prepared foods section, and hand slice their smoked fish. I will admit, my fascination with Zabar's began with a drawing by genius caricaturist Al Hirschfeld, pictured below.

The drawing is of the famous prepared foods counter, dotted with celebrities waiting for their numbers to be called, salamis hanging overhead. I wanted that quintessential New York experience, to buy my groceries where New York's literati and glitterati did. I don't know if the drawing was based on truth, or if he just inserted celebrity friends who lived in the area into the drawing (which he may well have done). But I wanted to go where the people were, not just to some chain that was easy to get to. Zabar's is priced extraordinarily reasonably for New York (and even not for New York), so it's easy to love. The store is always bustling with people, the food is fresh, and my bags are always brimming with goodies when I leave. As it was on the day when MDP and I left: salmon meatballs in an herbed cream sauce, Thai curry chicken salad, eggplant bruschetta, fruit compote and, of course, a famous bagel with Nova and cream cheese (which I have schlepped all the way to the Upper West Side for on multiple occasions). MDP had never been, and to my delight I found he enjoyed it as well.

Next, it was my turn to see something I had not previously explored. "I think the entrance is here," MDP said as we wound our way around the south end of Museum of Natural History and across Central Park West. Police barricades were already in appearance in preparation of Sunday's famous New York Marathon. But inside the park we went, following winding paths practically drowning in beautiful colored leaves--yellows, oranges, reds, and even the occasional misfit green--to a small beach of large rocks right next to a purple gazebo. The rocks overlooked a large lake surrounded by trees upon trees upon trees. A bright red one looked like it was on fire. Buildings seemed far away. The sun sank lower in the west and through candy colored clouds, fluffy tangerine, lavender and cotton candy streaming through the sky. High school kids blasted Top 40 radio, a man in a bowler hat and red suspenders took self portraits, two girls held a photoshoot near the water.

MDP and I sat near the water and dove into our trove of goodness, watching the sun set. As the sky grew darker, we left the park. In darkness, just before we got on the train, fireworks popped and burst through the sky in celebration of the upcoming marathon. Blues and reds and golds glittered through the sky, as if somehow planned just for us (and everyone else standing on the corner of 81st and Central Park West watching along with us). Somehow feeling warm in the chilly autumn air, we got on the train and headed downtown. I smiled. Every year, I fall in love with New York fall all over again.

Wishin' and Ziftin'

I think the only time in my life I've been jealous of brides is when they get to register for gifts. I mean, imagine putting together a giant list of things you want and having people actually buy them for you! It's virtually unheard of in non-married life, sadly. Until now!

Ziftit.com* is a website you can use to register yourself for gifts. Any gifts. Of any kind. That are available to purchase online. The site allows you to create "Zift Lists" or gift lists, for any occasion from any store online, or even from the Ziftit site, with no limit to items added. You can also send the list directly to your friends and family, and they can have the gift delivered directly to you (with an upgraded account, multiple people can even split the cost of a gift--super fun for those of us who aren't iBankers.). Voila! Last minute shopping and failed gifting attempts become a thing of the past. 

When assembling your list, Ziftit will tailor a Trending Feed based on your likes and dislikes, and products that match your personal style will magically appear. You can also create an event on their Events tab--birthdays, bachelorette parties, etc.--that will allow people to not only RSVP but to see what to get you for your special occasion! Another fun point is the Ziftit Barcode Scanner, which you can use on your mobile device to scan any item to add to your Zift List. The Barcode Scanner is especially lovely because when you scan a product, the app will show you where to find the product at the best prices.

What's more is that Ziftit is having a contest! The Trendsetter Contest will allow participants to choose their favorite products from all over the web and put them into their own personal Zift Lists with the Ziftit Browser Plugin on the site's product search. The goal is to get the most followers and be the most influential with your Zift List, via the site's "follow" feature. Add products you love and that appeal to your followers. The products will populate your followers' news feeds, allowing them to re-add products to their own Zift Lists. The "influence rating" will be increased by gaining followers and having your products re-added. When the contest ends on December 15, the participant who has the highest overall influence will win $10,000 and they'll be named "The Trendsetter of 2013." Sound like fun? Then head on over to Ziftit and get Zifting today! 

*sponsored post

Chinatown Sunday

Sunday morning I was summoned from being curled up on my bed by a knock at the door. It was SC, requesting my presence at a dim sum brunch. Having only been to dim sum one other time in my life, also with SC interestingly enough, I jumped at the chance. Brunch was organized by LA, who chose Jing Fong on Walker and Elizabeth in Chinatown. He liked it, he told me, because it reminded him of Hong Kong--he loves the chaotic, hectic nature of it all. So up and up and up we went in an elevator replete with mirrored walls and chandeliers to a giant ballroom fit for an enormous bar mitzvah. You simply don't find spaces like this in New York--more chandeliers, red walls decorated with gold dragons, endless circular tables themselves encircled by red leather banquet hall chairs and petite women in orange pushing around carts upon carts upon carts of food.

LA ordered for us--fried dough covered in rice noodles topped with soy sauce, sesame pastries filled with lotus paste, lotus leaves stuffed with pork and sticky rice, bok choi with oyster sauce, fried turnip cakes dotted with Chinese sausage, small, flaky egg custards, barbeque pork buns, and the list probably goes on and on. Cart ladies came by every few minutes and LA told them what he wanted, supplying the table with what seemed like an endless supply of goodies to nibble on. Absolutely everything was delicious. And between the 10 of us at brunch that day, the grand total was only about $12 per person. I was simultaneously elated and dumbfounded. Dim sum at Jing Fong reigns supreme, and New York will have to work pretty hard to prove to me there's something else as much fun and as exciting to do for brunch.

Post-dim sum MDP and I head to the East River to skateboard. Yes, I, Miss Manhattan, took to a skateboard. While the idea of doing it in traffic scares me half to death and going downhill makes me think of the dangers of land luging, I actually really enjoy it in the same way that people enjoy moving sidewalks and roller coasters. Come to think of it, skateboarding is a perfect medium between the two.

MDP is teaching me and while I am very much still learning, I do think I have the required muscle memory down. It's a little like choreography, pressing your foot to the ground to gain speed, then gliding then doing it all again. Press, press, glide; press, press glide. Not to mention the view along the East River is absolutely stunning: you get a beautiful sight of the Brooklyn Bridge and Manhattan Bridge going into Brooklyn. The sun was setting and there was a light orange glow around everything. We pissed off as many bikers as we could skateboarding in the bike lane. All was right with the world.

Next was a jaunt through Chinatown to get watermelon bubble tea. MDP's favorite is at the Canal Bakery (242 Canal St), a Chinese bakery that puts real watermelon in with your tea and blends it all together. Plus, bubbles! I actually don't like watermelon that much, but even I thought it was delicious, a nice, cool treat after a skateboarding lesson.

We sauntered down the streets, peering at the different groceries selling nearly-alive sliced open fish, spiky durian, very-alive crabs, herbal medicines in boxes with tigers and smiling, mustachioed men on them. It's amazing how someone else's neighborhood can be a new adventure in and of itself.

The last stop on our tour that day was a Malaysian jerky joint near the F train. And I'm sure my mother is reading this, clutching her face. "YOU ATE WHAT?" No worries, mom, it's cool. And yeah, I ate homemade beef jerky, chicken jerky and pork jerky. While the chicken wasn't really my bag, I dug on the beef and the pork, both doused in a sweet, tangy sauce (barbeque?). In fact, I was enjoying it so much I accidentally got on a train going in the wrong direction. None of us is perfect....Luckily we have New York to remind us of that, and that there's so much of the world we haven't seen, even in our own boroughs.

Better than Munchies

There are few better ways to end an evening than at a 24-hour Indian Deli, leaning against the counter and digging into a bowl of curried vegetables and rice. I know I've said multiple times that you can find anything you want at any hour in New York, but even I didn't think I could get so specific.

We were on the corner of Spring and Bowery when MDP suggested we get Indian food. I wasn't really in the mood for a sit-down dinner at 11 o'clock at night, but I followed anyway. To my delight, that's not what we were doing at all. 

The Punjabi Grocery and Deli has an unremarkable green awning, and three steps leading down to it from its 1st Street location. Behind the counter are Bollywood films for sale. A glass counter to the left of the register holds a trove of home-cooked Indian goodies, signified only by a number. I don't know exactly what everything is, but I make out a saag paneer (a creamed spinach made with homemade cheese), a curried vegetable dish, and samosas. Everything is vegetarian. MDP, who has been there many times before, orders us two combinations of the same numbers. I don't know what I'm about to eat, and I don't know that he does either, but I trust him and shortly we dive in. The two of us eat for a grand total of $7. 

Both of us are a little hazy from an evening of gallery openings and their open bars, so either the food just tastes delicious or it actually is. Peas, carrots and creamy yellow curry pop into my mouth via plastic fork and styrofoam bowl. MDP tells me to stir it up, but I stupidly ignore him and am shortly left with a bowlful of vaguely yellow rice, which I eat anyway. Next time I will know better. Under the counter where we lean are stacks upon stacks of Indian newspapers. Overhead are packages of Indian cookies, snacks, and candies. 

Like traveling with someone in their hometown, there's a beauty to seeing New York through someone else's eyes. What are their favorite haunts? Why do they like particular places so much? And if they've gone there repeatedly and never gotten food poisoning, what's to stop you from trying it, too? It's nice to go out with someone and find yourself a little more fearless than even you thought you could be. MDP works in the area of the deli, and found it on accident one time on a lunch break. Now he's a frequent visitor. It took next to nothing to convert me, too. 

So next time you find yourself in need of munchies (drunk or otherwise) on the Lower East Side, I recommend you head to the Punjabi Grocery and Deli. It's far better than $1 slices. 

Punjabi Deli & Grocery

114 E. 1st St between 1st Avenue and Avenue A

And if you're so inclined, the deli also has a Facebook page. 

Bantam Bonanza

The first time I saw Bantam Bagels, I thought they were genius: I mean, it was a bagel you could eat like a donut hole, filling and all. Any possible bagel flavor, suddenly it's yours in bite-size, reducing calorie count and increasing novelty factor! Big wins all around. 

Bantam Bagels was founded by Nick and Elyse Oleksak, two former Wall Streeters. The idea came to Nick in a dream one night, and now there's a full-fledged storefront in the West Village. Bantams, as they're known, come in all manner of flavors and fillings, from Hot Pretzel (salt bagel with cheese filling) to Cookies and Milk ("brown sugar walnut bagel with sweet chocolate chip cream cheese"....oh yes). 

Bantam was kind enough to invite me to sample some of their delightful offerings, fresh from the toaster and to take home! I felt like such a lucky girl, choosing from shelves upon shelves of flavors to make my baker's dozen of bantams. I nibbled on some, and also shared with my dear roommates. My favorites were The Hangover ("cheddar cheese and egg bagel topped with melted cheddar cheese filed with bacon cheddar cream cheese and a drizzle of maple syrup" --even upon writing that my mouth is watering. Not to mention it is probably perfect for a hangover) and the aforementioned Hot Pretzel, which actually tasted like its namesake. Wild. 

Should you find yourself Bantam-bound, remember to bite the hole! Say what?

Yep. The hole in the bagel where all that yummy filling goes. If you don't bite it, it'll squeeze everywhere but your mouth and you don't want that. Also try the bagels toasted if you so desire! Bring them to a party--they stay for about 4-6 hours without being refrigerated. Their menu also changes seasonally, so there's always something interesting and new to try. 

It's amazing to see the ways creativity blossoms here in New York. Because really, if you're looking to try something new, this is the place to do it! Open minds and curious tastebuds make for a great combination, which Nick and Elyse clearly recognize. But you don't really have to worry about trying bantams--they're just bagels, with stuff in or on them that you'd probably eat them with anyway. For the  most part, anyway; I mean, I had never eaten a bagel with bacon cheddar cream cheese before, but man I'd sure love to do it again. 

If you want to check out Bantam Bagels, they're in the West Village at 283 Bleecker Street, just before 7th Avenue. Happy Bantam-ing! 

The Box Lunch: "Plain bagel topped with crushed, roasted peanuts filled with peanut butter and sweet strawberry jam"

The Hot Pretzel 

The Hangover 

The Bleecker Street: "Pizza dough bagel topped with a thin slice of pepperoni. Filled with marinara mozzarella cream cheese"

Blindness

I worry that there's a special kind of jadedness that New Yorkers eventually acquire, and that jadedness involves not seeing the awesomeness around them. For a few weeks, I have been at a loss of things to write about on my blog. "I haven't done anything," I complain to myself, begging myself to be more interesting. When, in fact, there have actually been some incredible moments I had the distinct pleasure of experiencing in the past few weeks or so. At the time, though, I was just too blind to see it.

One of the things I love about this blog is that it forces me to take a look at my life and forget that not every post has to be a specific "event" that I go to. Sometimes you can write 1000 words about an instant without even trying. Other times, you have to work a little harder. The past few weeks I have spent aching my fingers and eyes into pitch mode (which any freelancer will tell you is the most difficult mode to be in), using something like Jedi mind tricks to will editors into publishing my work, forgetting to take some time for introspection because all I want to do is turn off my brain and watch Will & Grace from 11pm until I pass out.  With the start of this new month, though, I hope to change. So please forgive me, dear readers, if I have been remiss. Below are a potpurri of experiences I hope you too can come across at some point.

September 15
SD and I went down to Coney Island for a tattoo and motorcycle festival. While the festival itself did not inspire too much, it was SD's first trip so we took full advantage of the touristy wonderfulness of it all. SD slipped a quarter into a box with a glass front, the contents of which, a mannequin and her cat, we were told would instantly fall in love with us. To our delight, we found "instantly fall in love with us," meant the unironically '90s-attired lady and cat boogied to something that sounded like a Prince takeoff about love. It was a little like watching a sex doll sing to me, which felt both profoundly awkward and hilarious. We ate funnel cake on the beach, powdered sugar taking a comedic cue and blowing all over my black jeans. And, of course, Nathan's. Who in their right mind goes to Coney Island without getting Nathan's? I don't often go to the beach when it's not summertime, but it was really lovely to feel a brisk, crisp breeze as we walked down the boardwalk.

September 21

Interest piqued in zine and artist book culture by a brief trip to Printed Matter in Chelsea, MD (not a doctor, haha) was interested in attending the New York Art Book Fair, and I was happy to accompany him. The event, held at MoMA PS1 in Queens, turned the entire museum into vendor spaces and displays for the fair, which is the "world's premier event for artists' books, catalogs, monographs, periodicals, and zines." And it was free! In short, artists' books are books of artwork made by the artists themselves--both the artwork in them, and the book itself. Or, as Printed Matter says, "books or other editioned publications conceived by artists as art works, or, more succinctly, as 'artwork for the page.' We wound ourselves through the entirety of the building, even the furnace, looking at different artwork and installations. 

September 24

Amazing soup dumplings with crab and egg at Nan Xiang Xiao Long Bao in Flushing. First, you put a little bit of a soy sauce/vinegar mix on your spoon, then a dumpling. Then, you bite the dumpling and the soup flows into the soup spoon. It's an art I haven't mastered yet, to say the least, but I'd go back in a heartbeat to get better at it :)

The New World Mall, just off the last stop on the 7 train, also in Flushing. The bottom floor is a food court of all different kinds of Asian food--some even with live lobsters splashing about in tanks. Not to mention the best bubble tea I've had to date, for only $2 (at a place where I unfortunately can't remember the name, aaagh). 

September 29

I put on my best Nicki Minaj-like ensemble and took part in a rap video parody of "Gangster's Paradise" on a rooftop in Bushwick. This video idea sprung from the brain of Hannah VanderPoel, a comedy writer here in New York. Rago, myself, and eight other ladies spent the afternoon tottering around the rooftop in stilettos and sneakers and boots doing our best bad bitch impressions. And you had better believe that as soon as it comes out, I'll post a link ;)